Letting go of letting go
In each of my mentoring and healing relationships, I always begin by discovering what it is my client truly wants in their experience of being alive. This is always the engine for transformation. Without the faculty of the will no one would ever grow spiritually. The will has too often been identified with the ego, the false self, that trades in fear and insecurity. But this is not so. The will is the faculty of our own sovereignty and when exercised in service of our freedom it transcends the ego altogether.
The path of becoming human is very much like sailing a boat. In order to get anywhere you have to have a clear sense of where you are headed. The winds will blow from many directions and only the one who knows where s/he is going will be able to make use of this energy. You have to deeply desire to know the truth of who you are and what life is. You have to long to learn how to give and receive love. Yes, the winds of life outside of you will blow – sometimes with you, sometimes against you, but the skillful sailor uses each gust to move in the direction of home.
There are many spiritual teachings out there about ‘letting go.’ Unfortunately, lots of folks hear these teachings and think it is enough to hoist the sail and then go take a nap and by ‘letting go’ somehow they will wake up in a different place. Not so. They have given away their will and in releasing the tiller they will only get as far as the wind blows them and when the wind changes all progress will be lost. The real trick is in learning what to let go of and what to hold on to.
All teachings of ‘letting go’ apply to the external environment, that which is outside of our own energy field. In the sailing analogy it means letting go of trying to control the wind and the waves. There is nothing whatsoever to do about the wind. No amount of effort or striving will change the wind and so the skillful sailor wastes no energy attempting to manage the things beyond her control. But that sailor never lets go of the rudder, never gives away the intention to sail in the direction of home, of love, of truth. With this resolve even wind that is blowing directly away from home can be used to get closer as the sailor catches it in his sail and moves forward patiently at an angle.
Because the wind will blow and change and we need to remember where we are headed so we can use all that energy in service of our great desire. This is an art and cannot be learned overnight. Nobody is good at it right away. I hope you will contact me if you feel ready to set sail for home.